Recently, at the request of some family members, I recommended some long term care facilities to a couple of my clients. The moves, when they happened, were as different as my clients but in both cases I found some similarities.
No matter how careful you are, when discussing the move, there is always the point when the client states that "this is just going to be a temporary move" or something to that effect.
This is when your diplomatic best needs to shine. Without lying or promising something that won't or can't happen, you need to encourage your loved one to focus on some positive advantages of the move. Point out the lovely accommodations, the proximity of their room to the library or the dining room. Escort them around the grounds in order to familiarize them with all that it has to offer.
Socialization is going to happen, make the best of it by making sure the Admissions Director has a good understanding of your loved one's interests, capabilities and personality.
Make sure when you visit that you are friendly to the other residents. This goes a long way in helping your mom or dad adjust and provides some common talking points when you're not around. It also can help a lonely fellow resident a chance for a personal connection.
Facility apartments and rooms are not "home". Like most anything else, they need to take on the personality of the resident in order to be comfortable and one's own "safe have" in this unfamiliar community. So make it as homey has possible from the start! Put pictures on the walls, add family photographs around the apartment, place a special quilt on the bed, provide a good reading lamp and a comfortable chair or two. Having a chair for a guest is pretty important. Really, no one finds sitting on a bed very comfortable and your mom or dad will be more likely to invite someone to sit down for a visit if they can offer a place to actually sit!
Give your parents time to adjust to their new home. You making daily visits really doesn't help in that adjustment. They need to learn how things happen within their new community and who they can turn to. Developing rapport with the staff is crucial for a comfortable transition and a happy resident.
Change is always difficult but with thoughtful planning the adjustment to one's new "home" can effectively be made and the new resident will feel that they are truly "Home Sweet Home".
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